Dear Grad School Admissions Dean, Why do I want to go to State University to pursue my further education? Well, to be honest, you're my backup school. I'd rather get a degree from an Ivy League but, to be honest again, my GRE scores aren't that great. So I'm hoping you're having a crappy admissions year and won't mind taking me. Sincerely, A.

It's past midnight so can now say am getting married today. V. surreal. Had the rehearsal and the dinner--which were fine. V. v. surreal. Just like a dinner with best friends. (Should have those at other times, too, besides weddings and funerals.) Tried calling Fiance, as have yet to finish writing vows. However, Fiance is out with friends at bar, even though bachelor party was last night, so guess am writing vows alone. Oh well. In lieu of an embarrassing bachelorette party, sister ...

Given the shiftiness of Kerry's position (he has one? which one?), and Bush's inclination to war, oil, and disinclination toward the environment, and Nader's just overall weirdness, I want good ol' Dean back. He was different. He was out there, loud, new, fresh; not the old school, toeing the party line like Kerry and Bush, saying what people want to hear. I miss that scream. That was the one moment where I thought, Hey, the guy's got character. Bush's character: Defensive on terms of ...

20. Shut up. Please, for the love of everything pure and beautiful, SHUT UP. 19. Yes, sometimes I assign subjective grades, and sometimes I don't grade things as closely as I should. And it’s okay if you question me about grades—better than than bitching about it behind my back. 18. The word "while" is not a relative pronoun, like I told you, but rather is a subordinating conjunction. My bad. 17. I don't like some of you. No offense. 16. I think some of you are hilarious even thou...

Just now, my fiance is next to me on the couch, sleeping. Sleeping AND snoring. We're getting married in two weeks and I never knew he did this, and I'm a light sleeper; this doesn't bode well for Forever. Do I roll him over? Nudge him? He's not fat, not got asthma/allergies/anything like that.... Am I doomed to sleeplessness for the rest of my life, or will I get used to it? Or will we be in seprarate beds by anniversary #1? Holy crap, what have I gotten myself into?

One of my students is a know-it-all. When I test my students, I make the tests hard (see other blogs about that) and I make sure they apply what we've learned in class to everyday life. This class is all about seeing all sides to arguments and using them well. Then there's the know-it-all. She picks on any question if it's not exactly how I told them it would be on the review, and she'll correct multiple choice questions so that they're correct, then circle the letter. I make multiple choi...

Not that it wasn't fun, going into his office every week and having him pick apart our brains and histories and emotions, but damn! I'm glad to be done. Fiance (FI) thinks it was beneficial; I think I already knew that stuff, but if it was good for FI then it's good for us. Here's what we learned: Me = highly subjective, FI = highly objective, ergo a lot of me fence sitting and him so far out to pasture that I can't see him. Me = introverted, FI = introverted, ergo happily watching th...

Two of my freshers handed in their tests today with some comment about, "Man, that was hard " and then walked out the room into the tiled, resounding hallway and remarked (so that I, their instructor, and the rest of the class) could hear, "And it's only a 100-level class!" Probably some swear words in there. For two quarters I've enjoyed my students, I've challenged them, and hopefully I've made the class somewhat fun (it's a general studies requirement, so of course they're not going to...

Bumping into about twenty of my college freshers (my students, two days before finals) out past their curfew notwithstanding, I had a great time watching Harry Potter. This movie is darker and funnier than its predecessors and the director sticks to the storyline fairly well. The movie is very streamlined--no Hermione getting mad at Harry and Ron, no Firebolt getting confiscated, not much Snape/Harry friction--and I have to wonder if people who haven't read the books would understand all ...

Ah, Memorial Day weekend...that time of year when we all hit the road and then get pissed off at other drivers (and cops, those sneaky bastards). And although I was tempted to raise the finger in salute to these many stupid drivers I encountered, I did not. (Pats self on back.) But now I am. I was trying to pass a car in a bona fide passing zone, but it was on a hill and there was an oncoming car cresting the hill from the other side, and I do not have a powerful engine and so did not want...

This week my freshers are doing debates. The topics the class chose were legalizing gay marriage, death penalty, and reparations for slavery. One student missed the day we decided on topics and gave debate group preferences, so I assigned her to a group in need of a choleric. It was gay marriage. Two weeks later, debate week, she tells me a day before her debate that she doesn't feel morally comfortable debating gay marriage. I explained to her, as I had previously explained to the clas...

I mean, they must. If they didn't want me to elope, they would never have told me how to do my own wedding. What's with saying, "T, you need to have red roses instead of orchids in your bouquet," or "Canned music? No, you must spend $3000 on a DJ who will play the wrong songs, anyway" or "We know you drew up the guest list, but we thought we'd invite 30 extra people and not tell you, all of whom live in the area and so are bound to come. What? There's a limit to the number of people who ca...

I heard once that Nader was running for president. Funny, I haven't seen or heard from him since. But there is a way to get Nader's face on TV. Here it is: Link Bush's popularity soared when he found Sadaam; maybe Nader would actually get recognized by the media.

I am a cynic because that way the world never lets you down--you're only ever pleasantly surprised. (I know I thought of that, but someone else probably wrote it first. It sounds like the type of line that resides somewhere in the subconcious and then makes its appearance, only for the thinker to be told that someone else thought of it first. Stupid subconscious.)

The the-dog-ate-my-homework excuse has been replaced in the last few years with its alter ego, the the-computer-ate-my-homework excuse. I would know. I invented most of the variations on the computer theme. And now that I'm a professor, it really ticks me off. Here's why: Computer-eating-homework: Only works on teachers who still think computers are too technologically advanced for themselves. Most of us aren't that dumb anymore--we can't be, especially since so much of our campus communic...