Evolving.
Using all caps for good reason, I might add
Published on December 7, 2004 By Angloesque In Misc
The orientation to my new job takes four weeks. FOUR WEEKS! I know NASA programmers who have shorter orientations than this. Furthermore, I get to sit through ten hours of training to use a program I already know, own, and use often. And here's the kicker: Today one of my many, many supervisors sat me down for two and a half hours and READ THE STUPID STAFF MANUAL OUT LOUD TO ME, IN A TONE NOT UNLIKE THAT WHICH YOU SENSE WHEN YOU READ IN ALL CAPS. I wanted to die by the end of the day. Or shoot her. Really--I promise I can read. I am, after all, a copy editor, and I'm pretty damn sure that illiteracy isn't something I can get away with here.

*ahem*

Dear work people:

I am not stupid. I'm sorry I give you that impression. Please, please just give me some work to do. You're wasting my time and your money with these ridiculous sessions--I can already use MS Outlook (yeah, really hard, that one) and no, you don't need to sit me down to explain how the voicemail system works--written directions can be followed just fine; and you don't need to walk me out to the parking lot and show me where I can and cannot park (if it says "reserved" or "disabled" or "visitor," I can take the hint). And you know what else? I can work a computer. Indeed. But thanks. Anyway.

-A.

*

A note on the workforce: At my office, the people seem to be generally nice and there's just a small amount of interoffice politics and bitching. At least that's my first two days impression. But there is another phenomenon that annoys the befreakingcrap out of me: Gossip. I noticed it when I came in for an interview; I notice it every day. Gossip is an incredible time waster, and a lot of us are (or, in my case, will be) on the clock for clients. Furthermore, one of my supervisors spent most of her morning composing a little ditty to tell us about our "duties" to bring food for the Christmas party, though it was cleverly done in iambic pentameter with ABAB rhyme. I, on the other hand, read the manual, go to training sessions, and do anything but waste my time.

I'm of the opinion that I could probably work from 10 until 4, with a lunch hour, and get the same amount of work done that they do. People like me should be salaried; if I'm going to work for my hourly pittance, I'll turn into one of them.

*

Alas. I can never be completely happy. Even having a job gives me something to bitch about. (Though I must say I prefer bitching about *having* a job than not having one.)

*

GEE, I HOPE I CAN READ THE MANUAL FOR MYSELF TOMORROW.

grrr.

Comments
on Dec 07, 2004
At least your getting paid for those four weeks. Sure you don't need the training, but you could take the time to observe your coworkers and stuff, which it sounds like your already doing. Or maybe this whole article was just you bitching about work? Nothing wrong with that, hope your feeling better having shared.
on Dec 07, 2004
Buy earplugs and nap....

Best I can come up with.
on Dec 07, 2004
True. Money = good at this point. Actually, you make a fair point about observing the coworkers. I think that's important to having good working relationships and it's easier to come about that by observing.

Bitching about work actually makes me feel pretty guilty, having gone through my unemployment...phase/months/bout/drought/era/yougettheidea. So I officially feel bad. (Feel bad about getting a manual read at me, that is....)

-A.
on Dec 07, 2004
earplugs and nap...


D'ya think they'd notice?

-A.
on Dec 08, 2004
Oh. Even though "copy editor" sounds like a job I would really enjoy (really!), that situation sounds hideous. I hope it gets better for you.

Even having a job gives me something to bitch about.


Yeah, I think I know what you mean.

on Dec 08, 2004
I hate the first month of work. I had to read countless stacks of safety manuals and technical manuals and what else.... I think it's kinda extreme to have a supervisor read it to the new staff to make sure they know it. They only make us sign it so if we do something wrong like stick our finger in a tube of virus or use the lab microwave oven to heat up food and we get sick, we can't claim not to know these things. They make us go on pointless training sessions. Orientation with HR - ugh! All those stupid ice-breaker games with people with plastic smiles. (Oh look I still have mine...)

>> the people seem to be generally nice and there's just a small amount of interoffice politics and bitching.

Generally, that's how it is. Tip of the iceberg, most of the time.

>> Furthermore, one of my supervisors spent most of her morning composing a little ditty to tell us about our "duties" to bring food for the Christmas party, though it was cleverly done in iambic pentameter with ABAB rhyme

That was wonderfully sarcastic, A. *G*
on Dec 08, 2004
i know a woman in texas who gotta job with a tortilla chip distributor drivin a route of lil convenience stores makin sure the racks were full and in the right place etc.  they put her through a four-week training program too.  i suggested she tape the whole thing cuz there must be somethin she was missin .  
on Dec 08, 2004
This made me laugh A. My friend and I both applied at a customer service center (yes, we were pretty desparate), though I was unable to commit to the 160 hours of training required. To sit there and answer phones. You don't really do anything other than answer the phone and connect them to the correct people. 160 hours.

Do you have a PDA? I put eBooks on mine and sit there, acting like I am doing something important while I read eBooks. Or play games. Makes it much easier.
on Dec 08, 2004
lol @ BlueDev! Devious!
on Dec 09, 2004
Hey, Raven, you're back. Tip of the iceburg? Let's hope not. But you're probably right.

If NASA scientists, customer service reps, tortilla chip stockers (ha, wrote "stalkers" first) and I all have four-week trainings, then the world is a silly, silly place. I'm ready to tear my hair out, fashion it into a wig, and throw it at (one of) my supervisor(s). It's frustrating to feel like I'm doing nothing. Grr. So...inefficient. I hate inefficiency.

Today was the excellent intraoffice party where they recognize all the people who've been there for years and years. I was, to borrow an obscenely stupid phrase, bored out of my gourd. Were I an extrovert, it could be okay. But it was very, very bad. Ugh.

I don't have a PDA, BlueDev, but I'll think about getting one. Good idea.

-A.
on Dec 09, 2004
Do you have a PDA? I put eBooks on mine and sit there, acting like I am doing something important while I read eBooks. Or play games. Makes it much easier.


Touche Bluedev - I email myself whatever I am reading the night before and sit there staring at outlook looking really busy... great minds think alike!

A - I know it's tough being above average, but someone has to do it! - suck it up!