This week at my office, we've gone through two bottles of Lysol and at least as much soap in the bathroom and wash station. Not because we're dirty (it's a very clean, paperwork office) but because this stupid co-worker (Ditz-boss), who is salaried and doesn't have to worry about taking time off, has come to work anyway and God knows why, probably to infect us all with her dirty germs (a less common and less deadly form of germ warfare).
It's not that she sneezes all over the papers she hands me, or that she'll shake hands with someone right before they shake hands with me, or that she uses my keyboard just to "look something up real quick" or that she won't go home even though the boss told her to--oh, wait, yes, it's all that. Moreover, the things she's doing this week could easily wait until next week; there's no reason for her to stay, and even Uber-boss has told her, daily, to go home, to which she replies, "No, I'm fine."
Let's trace the germ genealogy, shall we?
Monday: Labor Day.
Tuesday: Ditz-sick-boss comes to work with a cold, saying she got it over the weekend and she's sure she's not contagious. Break out the Lysol and don't drink from the communal coffee pot.
Wednesday: Secretary #1 has a touch of a sore throat. Great muttering is heard amidst the spraying of Lysol and the sneezing of Ditz-boss.
Thursday: Secretary #1 has full-fledged cold and I have a sore throat.
Friday: I have a full-fledged cold and call in sick, but Secretary #1 is home sick, and Ditz-sick-boss finally doesn't come in 'cause she's "not feeling well," so I do go in, taking special care to wash my hands and everything I touch insofar as possible, even though by this point it's pretty much a lost cause.
I'm sure that over the weekend most of the co-workers will have contracted it in spite of our best efforts, including those of us who *aren't* salaried and miss $$ from our paychecks due to her thoughtlessness. (That's at least $100/day for Secretary #1 and $80/day for me, less taxes. I think we should charge her for lost wages.)
What's the moral of the story? DON'T COME TO WORK IF YOU'RE SICK! It's not just you who you'll be affecting--er, actually, infecting. [insert disclaimer about if you don't have a choice or the world will collapse if you don't go to work, etc etc.] Please think how you're affecting all our other paychecks, in addition to our morale, our opinion of you, and our office-related homicidal tendencies.