"Smile! It's good Friday" she said before I punched her.

Published on April 14, 2004 By Angloesque In Blogging

I was in Old Navy and she was the twitty salesgirl folding clothes in the dressing rooms. I walked in with one item and asked for a room. Actually, I walked in while she and two of her coworkers talked about the dumbest movies they'd ever seen before I finally got their attention.

She said, "Oh, there's not a line" so I started walking to a room. Then she said, "Well, wait. How many items do you have?"

I held up my hanger.

She said, "Let me get a number" and gave me a number to put on the door.

I nodded.

She said, "Smile! It's Good Friday!"

I just looked at her. That was kind of a non sequitur statement and I was processing what exactly Good Friday had to do with smiling and bad customer service. Then she said, "Or not."

No I didn't really punch her; I didn't even feel like punching her. But it brings up an issue I face a lot and it's frustrating.

Apparently I don't have a pretty face. I can deal with that. Smiles don't come readily to me--I am very introverted and generally quiet, and make friends very slowly. And though I do try to smile when someone is kind or smiles at me first, or if I get good service or if I want to reassure my students that they won't fail the course just because they failed the test--whatever it may be. I think I smile a lot in my day-to-day existence, if not in public. And yet I am often told, "Hey, smile!" by these exuberant, extroverted people who have no idea who I am and think that cheers me up. It doesn't.

So this twit tells me to "Smileit'sgoodfriday" and I don't quite get it and she is affronted and says "Or not." What am I supposed to do? Apologize that I forgot it was Good Friday when the law says "On Good Fridays ye must have smiles pasted upon thine faces"? Smile anyway? Tell her off for being rude (yeah, right, like I could do that)? Apologize for not having a friendly face? "I'm sorry, but the genetics my parents deposited on me did not generate a propensity towards smiliness."

Being extroverted and smiley does not give you the right to expect other people to be the same. I try to be gracious and smile, but I'm not always conscious of how I look. And I like not worrying about how others perceive me. Don't take that away from me.

Comments

Cann1bal

on Apr 19, 2004

"I'm sorry, but the genetics my parents deposited on me did not generate a propensity towards smiliness."
I would have said it had I thought of it and indeed if I was in your shoes... Ang, your funny, and your witty, you use it pretty good too, and you know Im gonna tell ya the same thing that my gf tells me, cause Im about the same way, If ya got it us it, hence Im here writing.

Adios

messybuu

on Apr 19, 2004

It doesn't sound as if she meant anything bad by what she said. Of course, if she made you wait while she talked to her friend, then you should have punched her.

Unfairman

on Apr 28, 2004

Ang, I understand your plea. But you should know that a lot of people who are smilers (like me) don't understand why people don't smile. It's tough to explain to people that you're just not a natural smiler, and I feel your pain. But it's equally hard to explain to others why you ARE smiling. Please, just show a little compassion. I have a dream where smilers and non-smilers can live together in peace and what not....

I hope you know I'm saying this with a lighthearted smile on my face.

MasonM

on Apr 28, 2004

I know exactly where you are coming from Angloesque. I am one of those people who, for some reason, genetics or whatever, look perpetually pissed off. I don't mean to. I am often in a very good mood. But people often think I am either really mad about something or really sad about something. Hey, it's just my face. I smile when it seems appropriate, but am not one of those smiles all the time people either.

Sometimes it actually works in my favor. If I have a complaint about something the "pissed off" look actually helps. If there's somebody who is looking for trouble, my look usually causes them to look elsewhere. It isn't all bad lol

But I do get tired of people asking what I'm mad about or trying to cheer me up when I'm already quite cheerful (for me anyway).

Angloesque

on Apr 29, 2004

Unfairman, I totally understand what you're saying. It's like there's a continuum and we're on opposite ends and there's no middle but we still have the same idea, if opposite, in common. And MasonM, you're the first person who's ever admitted to being similar. Thanks!

Angloesque

Ravenblack

on Sep 04, 2004

Angloesque, I too am an introvert and sometimes I just don't feel like smiling, and I would probably feel like breaking some teeth if someone comes up to me and expects me to smile just as widely as they do. Some people think that just because you don't smile, it means that you're unhappy. That may be true, but it also might be that it is because I don't like your face. lol ahem... I just have a general distrust of people who are always smiling and smiling too widely.

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